Foul Matter

**Disclaimer–this post will be icky for the faint of heart, but highly entertaining.**

Foul Matter–that’s one of the suggestions I found when I searched the Thesaurus site for a synonym for feces. I figured that it was a more polite title than the original idea of “Crap Disaster”.

You see, my darling baby girl finally pooped after a couple weeks. Yes, that’s correct–it’s been many days since we’ve been graced with a poopy diaper in our household. We did check with her doctor about this and it’s normal. According to the doctor, breastfed babies can be so efficient with their digestion that they can often go days with a bowel movement. As long as she was acting like her normal self (which she was), there was no need for panic. The doctor’s longest poop holdout on record was 15 days.

I was in the midst of washing a few dishes when I heard the sounds of Jamayia grunting in her Exersaucer. Actually, I’m pretty sure I could also smell her from where I was, a few feet away. Not a good sign.

I picked her up, and well, she definitely wasn’t smelling like roses. We went to her bedroom to begin “the change”. I peeled back the diaper to find it literally plastered in poop. Plastered is the prefect words because of the texture. I’ll spare you the details there…

On a sidenote, I must say that it was a gorgeous colour. The best I can come up with is this colour from Behr:


Pretty, ain’t it? It’s called Autumn Orange. This is the kind of colour that would look great in a living room with vaulted ceilings and white baseboards and hardwood floors…but I digress.

That was probably the only positive thing about this diaper change. Of course, like my diaper-adapted version of Murphy’s Law–when it’s ickyist, baby’s hands must get in it.

Yes, Jamayia got her hands in there, and proceeded to grab her socks. Now the once pink socks were pink & orange. Not good. Then, I discovered that the diaper was filled to overflowing. Again, not good. The safest way to remove her shirt would’ve been to cut it off. But, I couldn’t do that safely. I said a prayer, and tried to take of her shirt in a way that the dirtyness stayed at her back.

Oh, and did I mention that when she was playing gleefully with her socks, she was also grabbing at my arms? I was just thankful that she wasn’t trying to play with her mouth too!

So, it was time for the first bath of the day.

My darling was quite sleepy, so she wasn’t looking forward to the bath–and she started to bawl…h-a-r-d-c-o-r-e. Crying is a rare occurance for Jamayia, so I know that she was just sad.

But, after a quick bath, we were both cleaner and fresher. She got a nice little snack and settled down for a nice long nap. I had to soak her change pad, shirt & socks. After a good soaking, I also had to hand scrub out the stains. Then, proceeded to use the ‘pre-soak’ option on the washing machine. They all came out. Yippee!!

I just had to share this latest adventure. I wish I could say it’d be the last time I’d have to experience this, but fat chance. Upon later reflection, I was praising God that this was all I had to deal with. Many people go through so much drama with their babies (and other things in their lives) and have such a stressful time. So, the diaper was icky & the smell was out of this world. But it was a temporary situation and it’s over.

Thank God it’s over. I hope that she doesn’t “store up” again for another couple of weeks.